The day after I came out on FaceBook about my Alopecia I posted this letter to my friends and the world. It was shared over 10,000 times. I don't know how many people actually read it but I'm so glad I wrote it. They were words I needed to set free. If you want to know how I really feel about Alopecia, here...
I have something more important to tell you than that.
My initial post about my Alopecia was for two purposes. First, every time I run into someone that knew me when I had hair they initially think I'm sick. We have to talk about it. I don't like talking about it. Second, when I talk about it I cry. I don't like to cry. I just can't help it. I weep. I don't like weeping. So now, if you've read my post, when we see each other we can skip all of that! But I knew when I was writing the post, that this was my message for the masses and I was leaving out a HUGE piece of the puzzle. I left it out because I needed you to get to the end and not stop reading until my message was conveyed. Now, for those who wish to read it, this is the most important part of mine or any story. Stop reading now if you don't want to read about faith, hope, love, trust, etc. I'm gonna praise Him...there will be scripture...I'm going to quote lyrics to worship music! Turn back now...I warned you!
I worship an awesome God. He loves me so much. I'm precious to him. When my babies are sleeping all snuggled up in my arms and I can't stop staring at them and it feels like my heart will burst, and the pride and the joy floods my mind and I am in love, that's when I remember that that is how much God loves me. He knows the number of every hair on my head (Matthew 10:30). In his mysterious, infinite wisdom, those hairs, now long gone were important to him. And my job was to trust him, to trust him with my hair. And now that it's gone, I do not believe for a second that he failed me. I bound myself to my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ a long time ago. I acknowledge that every good thing I have is his. He lets me live in one of his beautiful homes, and drive one of his nice cars, and I get the privilege of living in this body. But it's all on loan. One of my favorite songs says, "We fall down, we lay our crowns at the feet of Jesus." What is your crown? Is it your beauty? Is it your wallet? Is it your family name? How about your athleticism? Do you wear the Republican crown or the Democrat crown? Is your race your crown? Your clothing size? How about your pain? Your independence? Your house? Your car? You can't take it with you. Neither can I.
Sometimes I wake up in the morning and start my prayer, "This is the day that the Lord has made..." That's about when I fall back to sleep, but when I awaken again I start thanking him. I thank him for all my many blessings and like Corrie Ten Boom thanking God for fleas, I have thanked him for the loss of my hair. I am closer to him because I desperately sought his face for strength and most of all peace. And it's brought me closer to you. And you are more important than my hair. Now I'm not at all implying that God took my hair. But he has walked this with me. He has given me peace that passes all understanding (Philippians 4:7). He knew I was headed for a fall so he built a beautiful safety net out of Charlie and family and friends, my support group and His amazing, brilliant, perfect word.
Here's the point. He is the father to the fatherless, the great comforter. Whatever you are going through he wants to go through it with you. Do not let politics or the deceptions of this world, or clumsy Christians keep you from his loving embrace. Nothing you have done can diminish how precious you are to him. He will meet you right where you are. Place your crown at his feet, then ask him about his plans for you. He has plans to give you hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11). Read his word, get to know the character of this "Jesus" and take a leap of faith. Trust him. Abundant blessings are waiting. I love you.
